Sunday, February 16, 2003

isn't it weird to think about time? what IS time? is it just the monotonous tick-tock of a clock? tick, tock, tick, tock, tick, tock... i just realized that i never actually hear the tick-tocking of the clock until i sit still...and just think. most of the time i'm too busy to just stop and listen. it's usually a matter of being on time for things... getting places... i wonder how much time i have left here... it's weird to think that with every tick and every tock i'm getting one step closer to the end.. i suppose that can be a really depressing thing to think about, but on the other hand, it can be very motivating at the same time. it depends on your outlook about life i guess, is the glass half empty or half full?

and nothing matters. think about it... you live, then you die. nothing you do really matters. ok, maybe it changes a few peoples' lives, but they die too. so really, nothing matters. there is no point in anything. there's no point in trying. there's no point in trying to get rich. there's no point in helping anyone else. there's no point in trying to be the best.
i've acknowledged this fact, and i refuse to dwell on it. i've moved on. does it really matter that you have a high paying job? does it really matter that your house is bigger than your neighbors? does it really matter that your shoes coordinate with your purse? does it really matter that your hair is perfect b/c you spent 2 hours straightening it? does it really matter that you're on a varsity sport? does it really matter that you failed a math test? does it really matter?
sorry, it doesn't. it really doesn't.
you just have to stop caring so much. do things because you have a desire to do them. don't do them b/c other people want you to do them. if you have no passion for what you do, you'll never get anywhere. well..no. i take that back. you'll get somewhere alright, but you'll never get to the place you want to be. dream big. b/c you can do anything. the only thing stopping you is yourself. don't care about what other people think... you can't please everybody...i learned that the hard way a long time ago... so today.. just stop for a minute. listen to the tick-tock of a clock. look up at the sky.. can you see the clouds moving? try to see the bigger picture. and do something that you WANT to do. everything else can be put on hold for a few minutes b/c it doesn't matter...

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