hmm... what do i want?
what DO i want?
what do YOU want?
what do i need?
who do i love?
who loves me?
does what i do matter?
am i too idealistic? a lot of people say i am but no, i'm not- there's no such thing.
what causes people to hate?
can hate be stopped?
what about love- what causes people to love?
and what makes people indifferent and apathetic?
what if everything is a lie?

who wants to hear my list of things my dream guy would have/do? well, here they are- no specific order or whatever. i'm sure you're dying to know...

1. funny
2. charismatic
3. romantic
4. brown hair
5. deep sparkly eyes
6. muscular
7. good listener
8. very understanding
9. supportive
10. doesn't wear tight pants
11. trustworthy
12. individual
13. has good friends
14. nice ass
15. doesn't care about his hair, but it still looks good
16. misses me when i'm gone
17. has soft hands, but they're still tough
18. gives me flowers
19. is protective, but not overly so
20. has good teeth
21. can pull off wearing a necklace
22. looks good in a hat
23. has goals and priorities
24. not apathetic
25. has a dog he loves
26. not immature, but not totally mature
27. is a good driver
28. cares about school to an extent
29. is loveable
30. is huggable
31. can sing, doesn't have to be well
32. is passionate about something
33. comfortable with himself
34. in active in some sort of art
35. is honest
36. keeps his ego in line
37. calls me just because
38. gives me a nickname
39. isn't afraid to go out on a limb
40. doesn't act all macho or whatever
41. can dance or at least tries! (haha lauren)
42. loves his mom
43. makes me want his pants- OFF! =P
44. says cute things
45. doesn't wear brand new shoes
46. challenges what i think
47. is easily amused
48. can talk with him for hours
49. doesn't smoke or drink
50. has a smile that can always cheer me up :)

so yeah, there it is. there's some more but 50 is enough for now. *sigh*.. but it doesn't matter... i can't expect someone to be all of those things, can i?
..............................