Sunday, March 30, 2003

i'm still sick today. :( i feel so forgotten. i finished reading there are no children here. 2 days- bet that's a record. omg, this is so dirty. we have a joystick thing and this is what it says on the box:

THE COMFORTABLE HIGH-PERFORMANCE CONTROLLER
Award-Winning Handle Design
Throttle Control
Steel-Weighted Base
Realistic Rubber Buttons
Solid Construction
Extra Long 7-Foot Cable

hahahaha, does anyone else find that extremely dirty or is it just me???!
...
.....
yeah, it's prolly just me. haha.

i'm sleepy again. already.

aiy...it's only 7:30 and i'm ready for bed...

i have a pet frog. betcha didn't know that, did ya? well i do. he's right over there. ~~~>
i wish i were a frog. ::ribbit ribbit::
i would make a good frog, don't you think?

hmm.. i bet there's an online quiz i can take that will tell me if i'm a good frog or not. let's go see....

::time passes::

oh yeahhh!! haha, i took all the froggie quizzes i could find! looks like i would be a good frog after all! hahahahahahaha.... here we goooooooo.......

In rural communities, tradition calls for a great big red lever that causes the end of many fish when you pull it. DANGER! PROXIMITY IS NIGH!
You cannot escape your destiny! Frogdom is on the
horizon!


Is it your destiny to become a frog?
brought to you by Quizilla

WOW, you ARE a frog!!!!!


Are you a FROG???
brought to you by Quizilla

For the best people alive!
Your very kind!


Are you a princess or just a selfish frog?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're dancing frog
You're dancing frog! you like to have fun! You're
crazy and wild, and the life of every party!
Keep dancing!


Which type of frog are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

YOU ARE PRINCE CHARMING!!! You are every girls
dream guy....you are intrested in everything
she has to say or do..you remeber importan
dates like birthdays and anniversaries. You
would never hurt her on purpose. Hey wanna go
out? hehe :)


Are you a prince or a frog? (boys, girls can take if they are bored :)
brought to you by Quizilla

You are a cute ickle TreeFrog


Are you a TreeFrog??
brought to you by Quizilla

HASH(0x86e7f34)
You are the happy frog!


What Kind of Froggie God are YOU?
brought to you by Quizilla

100% Cangraz! You are a true frog! you enjoy, bugs,
and all sorts of insects! Mabye we'll meet on
the pond sometime!


What Kind of Frog are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

I'm sorry... you are NOT a froggyvampire... please
leave your name and number, oh, and
bloodtype... and your life long scedual...
thanks!! XDDD mwahh haa haa


What froggyvampire are you?!
brought to you by Quizilla

Saturday, March 29, 2003

being sick sucks. i'm stuck at home :( well, maybe it doesn't completelyyyy suck. i've had a lot of time to sleep and think about things. i slept most of yesterday and today and i feel a lilll better, but not much. alright, which one of you beasts made me sick?? hmm?? yeah, that's what i thought. =P
oooh fun. i'm messin w/ the html stuff. haha, now it looks ugly but hey, i'm workin on it.

Friday, March 28, 2003

She's Always A Woman

She can kill with a smile
She can wound with her eyes
She can ruin your faith with her casual lies
And she only reveals what she wants you to see
She hides like a child
But she's always a woman to me

She can lead you to live
She can take you or leave you
She can ask for the truth
But she'll never believe you
And she'll take what you give her as long as it's free
She steals like a thief
But she's always a woman to me

Oh, she takes care of herself
She can wait if she wants
She's ahead of her time
Oh, and she never gives out
And she never gives in
She just changes her mind

She will promise you more
Than the Garden of Eden
Then she'll carelessly cut you
And laugh while you're bleedin'
But she'll bring out the best
And the worst you can be
Blame it all on yourself
Cause she's always a woman to me

She is frequently kind
And she's suddenly cruel
She can do as she pleases
She's nobody's fool
But she can't be convicted
She's earned her degree
And the most she will do
Is throw shadows at you
But she's always a woman to me
"i WANT your mom- but not in bed, she's just cool." -Lauren

ghettolicious

i'm going to have people over for brunch next saturday

let's pretend to have a show and then lock the people in the basement. MOOhaha

salsa band

"i hate you. men suck."

you're a beast

i'll be BVACH
Hakuna Matata!
What a wonderful phrase
Hakuna Matata!
Ain't no passing craze

It means no worries
For the rest of your days
It's our problem-free philosophy
Hakuna Matata!

Why, when he was a young warthog...
When I was a young wart hoooog!
Very nice.
Thanks!
He found his aroma lacked a certain appeal
He could clear the savannah after every meal
I'm a sensitive soul, though I seem thick-skinned
And it hurt that my friends never stood downwind
And oh, the shame
(He was ashamed!)
Thoughta changin' my name
(Oh, what's in a name?)
And I got downhearted
(How did you feel?)
Ev'rytime that I...
Pumbaa! Not in front of the kids!
Oh... sorry.

Hakuna Matata!
What a wonderful phrase
Hakuna Matata!
Ain't no passing craze
It means no worries
For the rest of your days
Yeah, sing it, kid!
It's our problem-free
philosophy...
Hakuna Matata!

Hakuna matata
[Repeats]

It means no worries
For the rest of your days.
It's our problem-free philosophy
Hakuna Matata
[Repeats]
are you more of a whore than you were before?

whoa triple rhymage...

i'm so sick. erggh..i hate being sick!! :( it sucks. i've been IN BED all day. hahaha....ok, not funny.

please stop the insanity.

Thursday, March 27, 2003

everything is making me happy right now. i'm content for the first time in a while. it's the first night of spring break so everything school-wise is over. i hung out with lauren after school and we saw everyone downtown. it was crazy. we read this amazing feminist book at anderson's- i really want it. then we went back to her house and made 2 lists. the first was reasons why we hate men and the other was a list of why we love them. hehe, good stuff. aww...so much cuteness after that. awwwwww... i'll just go and cry now. :) hehe. so after all that we decided to go drive around and we ended up at one of the covered bridges on the riverwalk. it was amazing. we sat on the side of the bridge and hung our legs off the edge. the rain was a feeble drizzle and it seemed to dance on the river water. the lights reflecting off the water were golden and tranquil. it was nice to just have time to think and collect my thoughts with such beauty surrounding me. they were so many cute couples walking down the riverwalk and it made me cry. not because i necessarily want that right now, it just makes me happy to see other people in love. it gives me hope. and it's all so cute...aww... :)

Monday, March 17, 2003

omg, i don't believe this. i'm studying for ORCHESTRA. we have a written test- geeeeeez.. ah...what a beast.
the book i'm reading- ishmael- is really good. it's kind of odd, but if you get past that it has a really good message and it's making me think about things i've never thought about before. i like that a lot.
ah! my one green painted nail scared me just now! lol, oh MAMA! and my pinky really did shrink! i'm not kidding!!
"caresssssss me down" ;)
when i hear you
say that you are
a nobody, i just
want to hold you
and tell you how
much of a
somebody you are
to me.
"sex bomb, sex bomb, you're my sex bomb, and baby you can turn me on!"
haha, greatest song ever. lol
i was thinking about how dirty i am during french today. it's really bad. i need to stop....
nah....i'll never stop! (in BED) MOOhaha

ANYWAYS...
oh man, i just watched bush's lil speech... aiy... looks like we'll go to war with iraq. man... you know what makes me really mad? that people ALLOW guys like sadaam to have sooo much power over them. it's sick that ONE man can cause so much evil. moral of the day: STAND UP FOR WHAT YOU BELIEVE IN.

Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by the traffic from both sides.
-- Margaret Thatcher

i'm so happy though. things are good for me right now. :)
happy happy happy
:) :) :)

and i did my beastloads of homework already! haha, that's the way it's done!

i'm gonna give phil our extra spinny chair! everyone needs to have a spinny chair- it's practically a law yo! haha, i'm glad i found it in the basement. he's a lucky guy.

peace train!

haha, my irish earrings rock da boo~TAY.

i have a 4-H meeting tomorrow night. i want more high schoolers in it yo! helping people with me = good! :)

ben dover! MOOhaha!

"sicko."

i'm in such a good mood. whoa.... gOOD is the same as mOOD, but not. innnteresting. what a crazy language.

hehehe, i'm so happy. i can't think of anything. :) peace! <3 SuZiEs

Saturday, March 15, 2003

it feels like sunday.
today was a weird day.
i'm not as mad as i was now.
i guess that's a good thing.
i babysat tonight.
i got $40.
yeehaw.
but i really don't do it for the money.
money can kiss my ass.
twice.
peter went to bed so i had nothing to do.
i actually watched tv.
it was weird.
i haven't watched tv for...a lonnng time.
i watched the most mindless thing i could find.
"the real world- battle of the sexes"
oh yes.
that was interesting.
i want james' pants-
OFF.
but not really.
i'm tired.
not sleepy.
tired.
i'm burned out.
i want a break from everything.
and warm weather.
i hate being cold.
i'm always cold.
it sucks.
i must have a messed up body temperature.
i should prolly go to bed.
but i'm not tired.
well, maybe i am.
i'm bored.
boredom sucks.
burping is fun.
i want to be innocent.
i realized something.
you can't change people that aren't innocent.
no matter how hard you try.
"you can own the earth and still, all you'll own is earth until...you can paint with all the colors of the wind..."
"aint it funny how some feelings you just can't deny and you can't move on even though you try
aint it strange when you're feelin things you shouldn't feel?
aint it funny how a moment can change your life and you don't wanna face what's wrong or right,
aint it strange how fate can play a part in the story of your heart..?"
"so take a good look at my face, you'll see my smile looks out of place, if you look closer it's easy to trace the tracks of my tears..."
"1,2, 3, 4, looks like i'm alone again and i feel fine, doesn't really matter now, cuz i'm alright, left me on my ass again, but i don't mind, looks like i'm alone again and feel fine.."
"nothing's fine, i'm torn, i'm all out of faith, this is how i feel, i'm cold and i'm ashamed bound and broken on the floor, illusion never changed into something real, i'm wide awake and i can see the perfect sky is torn, you're a little late, i'm already torn.."
"how many roads must a man walk down, before they call him a man? the answer is blowing in the wind..."
"she's in love with the world"
"say that you'll stay forever and a day..."
"we don't have to stay friends, let's pretend to be enemies... yeah whatever makes you happy..."
"and the clock on the wall has been stuck at 3 for days and days"
"love, why you look so sad? tears are in your eyes, c'mon and come to me now, don't be ashamed to cry, let me see you through, cuz i've seen the dark side too, when the night falls on you and you don't know what to do, nothing you confess could make me love you less, i'll stand by you, i'll stand by you, won't let nobody hurt you, i'll stand by you..."
"if that's all you will be, you'll be a waste of time,
you've dreamed 1,000 dreams
none seem to stick in your mind
two points for honesty
it must make you sad to know that
nobody cares at all..."
ooh! i'm so excited. i ordered the book "ishmael" online and it just came today. it's so cute b/c it's from someone-not like a company. it was all wrapped up and taped and it's kinda cool to think that someone had to do that. hehe. i love getting mail. :)
man, i was really pissed off last night... but i don't wanna talk about it..
the flower show was a lot of fun. i bought a mini rose plant, a hummingbird thing for my garden, and purple shamrocks. the roses and shamrocks are in my room now.. along with the other plants i already have up there and my white daises. hehe, it's getting insane, but i love it.
haha, WHAT am i wearing?? i have my big sweatshirt on and a long black skirt with pajama pants underneath it. ooooh mama, haha, i'm a sight.
the word of the weekend is: whatever.
i usually hate the word "whatever"...
go figure.
no one IM's me. whatever. i don't care anymore..

Wednesday, March 12, 2003

i'm still procrastinating. ooooooh MAMA. so i'm going to make a list of random things that pop into my head over a period of about an hour. this'll be interesting.

daniel quinn
horny
video killed the radio star
groping..and brian
trenties
the gymnastics mat that i WANT
kristen
poncho
"that's right."
ishmael
gorilla
norah
monkey
gary
thesaurus
lauren
big words
big bird
yellow
methane gas
rashaan
volleyball
brownies
pencil sharpener
the family stick
basements
phil
fish
phish
josh
ice ice baby
"and then the boredom will set in.. it's all just a matter of time..."
subliminal messages



Tuesday, March 11, 2003

yeah so. i have a horrible case of ennui. *sigh*... this week has been very interesting. last night i got really sick.. ewwies. haven't really done my paper yet either. i got away with not really doing it.. haha yeah that's the way it's done! well, i'm gonna go take my BUBBLE BATH now! hehe, finally...

Monday, March 10, 2003

haha, can you tell i have a paper due tomorrow? my away message says, "There's no fun in having nothing to do- the fun is having lots to do and not doing it." so true. bleaurgh, it's already 7 and i really don't want to stay up late tonight. i want to take a bubble bath with candles, put my wet hair in a towel, put on my fuzzy robe, climb into bed under the covers and curl up with ishmael. *sigh*... like that's gonna happen anytime soon.
alright. i'm tired of indecisiveness. i can't stand it. either you want to or you don't. aiy yi yi... can't stand it. i mean, i try and tell people things straight up and i want them to do the same to me. i don't care if you say something i don't want to hear- i can deal with it. oh mama...
so yeah. i have a 3-day week~! =-P hehehe, YEAH all-day field trips! that's what i'm talkin about! hehe. schmuckaroni... i have my enr written JLC paper thing due tomorrow... definitely haven't started it yet. oops. when will i learn not to put things off until the night before? yeah, that's right. i'll never learn. psh... would cares about essays anyway? i mean, no one reads them and nobody likes writing them so what's the point? i really want to start reading ishmael but nooooo... i have to do this crap first. norah and i were talking today about how much better class would be if we didn't analyze things so much. we should have discussions and read the book out loud, act it out, play mah-jong, talk to people who immigrated to the united states and hear their stories, take a field trip to chinatown (well, maybe not..) those things would make the book come to life for us and it would be so much more meaningful!! maybe i'll teach at a private school where they don't have so many stupid district requirements and all that gabarrrrrrge. oh mama... guess i should start writing now- yet another way to snuff out my creativity. =-/

Sunday, March 09, 2003

hmm... what do i want?
what DO i want?
what do YOU want?
what do i need?
who do i love?
who loves me?
does what i do matter?
am i too idealistic? a lot of people say i am but no, i'm not- there's no such thing.
what causes people to hate?
can hate be stopped?
what about love- what causes people to love?
and what makes people indifferent and apathetic?
what if everything is a lie?

who wants to hear my list of things my dream guy would have/do? well, here they are- no specific order or whatever. i'm sure you're dying to know...

1. funny
2. charismatic
3. romantic
4. brown hair
5. deep sparkly eyes
6. muscular
7. good listener
8. very understanding
9. supportive
10. doesn't wear tight pants
11. trustworthy
12. individual
13. has good friends
14. nice ass
15. doesn't care about his hair, but it still looks good
16. misses me when i'm gone
17. has soft hands, but they're still tough
18. gives me flowers
19. is protective, but not overly so
20. has good teeth
21. can pull off wearing a necklace
22. looks good in a hat
23. has goals and priorities
24. not apathetic
25. has a dog he loves
26. not immature, but not totally mature
27. is a good driver
28. cares about school to an extent
29. is loveable
30. is huggable
31. can sing, doesn't have to be well
32. is passionate about something
33. comfortable with himself
34. in active in some sort of art
35. is honest
36. keeps his ego in line
37. calls me just because
38. gives me a nickname
39. isn't afraid to go out on a limb
40. doesn't act all macho or whatever
41. can dance or at least tries! (haha lauren)
42. loves his mom
43. makes me want his pants- OFF! =P
44. says cute things
45. doesn't wear brand new shoes
46. challenges what i think
47. is easily amused
48. can talk with him for hours
49. doesn't smoke or drink
50. has a smile that can always cheer me up :)

so yeah, there it is. there's some more but 50 is enough for now. *sigh*.. but it doesn't matter... i can't expect someone to be all of those things, can i?
..............................


Thursday, March 06, 2003

haven't written here in awhile.. i've either not been home or not in the mood to write down how i'm feeling. i'm kinda in a crappy mood right now but a lot of great stuff has been happening. i need to complain right now and i'll save the good stuff that happened for later when i'm actually thinking clearly. sound good? yep, sure does.
too many people take me for granted. especially my family. i'm expected to do anything they want me to. i mean, it's not a lot of stuff, but when they do want something they expect me to do it.